MC Harvey has been smoking some serious shit

She must have the best dentist in the fucking world!

Cheryl Cole took to Twitter (classy) to deny any claims of any relationship with sort of gangsta rapper wannabe person MC Harvey. So either the Cole of Cheryl is continuing her norm and picking fucking losers as sexual conquests or MC Harvey has a new 'project' and wants all the publicity he can get or it could be to add even more fucking unnecessary publicity that chavy Cheryl needs especially due to the negative comment surrounding her copied shoe designs. Anyway I think its fair to say that former Girls Aloud singer and X Factor judge Cheryl has a type and money is a key attribut.

For once Jen beats Ang

Brad Pitt take note, the art of personal grooming.

Long has there been a rivalry between Jennifer Aniston and Angelina Jolie; Angelina was the first to give birth (54 million times to 64 million different mothers in 74 million countries) but Jennifer was the first to marry Brad Pitt which is probably why Ang will never marry the fucking freaky overrated actor. Anyway back to the story, Jennifer got hot! At the Directors Guild Awards she stepped out looking hotter and a hell of a lot younger with boyfriend Justin Theroux while Angelina looked frozen faced and face with yet again another boring black dress.

Nearly I smile there Angelina

Is Denise Welch having an affair? Probably.

At least she was wearing a bra.

The winner of Celebrity Big Brother was seen celebrating with her husband of 30 years, Tim Healy's 60th birthday in Alderley Edge yesterday despite the rumours she's been fucking party planner Lincoln Townley. Her behaviour at times may be inappropriate but is she inappropriate enough to have a full blown affair which could potentially destroy her career plus put her two sons from a rough ordeal involving the media? So no, I don't think she is having an affair she is just someone who just wants to have fun making her an easy target for criticism, just ask major cunt Michael Madsen.

The 'old bird with a great pair of jugs' WON!!!

If you've got it, flaunt it!

For once there has been a worthy winner of a reality TV program and it comes in the face of the fucking crazy, amazing DENISE WELCH! She really did deserve to win the rest of the house where just complete wankers (Kirk), pointless cunts who are good to look at but if you seen them in the street you wouldn't run up to them for an autograph (Georgia) then the annoying two face twats like Nicola and the tranny twins who share the same personality and have no fucking brain between them! Denise was the worthy winner so Michael and the twins can eat shit, just look at the ratings which have gone up 800,000 from last year.

Ferris Bueller has ANOTHER day off!!

He may need to touch up the salt and pepper.

Since Matthew Broderick married Sex and the City star, Sarah Jessica Parker he has remained as 'arm candy' accompanying her on red carpet events, until now! As now aged 49 Broderick is in talks two create a sequel to one of funniest fucking movies of all time Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Not only will this be rewarding for his career but also for his bank balance as it is highly likely to be one of the highest earning movies of 2012, which I can't wait to see personally. 2012 is also set to be a good year for his equally acttractive spouse is sure to have some sort of a role in Sex and the City sequel. Its a good year for the Broderick Parkers. Calm down dear, it's only a commercial!

Demi ain't looking so good

Would you divorce Demi Moore?

Horny cougar Demi Moore was recently admitted to hospital for anorexic tendencies (don't worry I have no fucking clue whats it means either) and more drug abuse. It is believed that Demi had inhaled laughing gas probably to get over her recent divorce to very overrated Ashton Kutcher (that annoying twat who stole Charlie Sheen's role on Two and a Half Men). Not sure why she's to bothered really as she is one hot 49 year old, with a lot of money who could easily get another much younger husband hopefully one who is less of an attention seeker and with less of a fucking ego. Kutcher was recently seen leaving a Brazilian nightclub and generally acting like a cunt towards the situation and just blanking the reporters, well done Demi Moore you got away from this silly fool!

'Chelsea Handler slept her way to the top'

I'm a fan but, she looks slightly like Miss Piggy, oink oink!

Joan Rivers who is a modern day pioneer, who pioneer the way for generations of female comics, like Chelsea Handler who is just annoying and tells the same unfunny jokes all the fucking time! Joan also called this copycat cunt a 'whore' and a 'drunk', which is kinda true considering she's made her way through everyone from the President of E! to 50 Fucking Cent plus there's the fact that her cleverly ghost written book is called; Are You There, Vodka? It's Me Chelsea. Chelsea only responded by saying 'what the fuck do I care about Joan Rivers?', which to me just seems like she does give a fuck or she would have came at fighting possibly with reference to her age (78) or her numerous amounts of plastic surgery.